Want to get more adventurous in bed but not sure which sex toy is right for you? Sex therapist Isiah McKimmie has everything you need to know. ATTENTION: adult content
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As a couples therapist and sexologist, my work helps individuals and couples have harmonious relationships and increase their joy in the bedroom. Sex toys can be a fun way to do this.
They increase playfulness (vital to keep cravings alive), build your confidence, and increase enjoyment. They also help you celebrate yourself as you enjoy the single life.
There are some simple steps you need to follow if you are buying a sex toy for yourself or someone else and want to make sure it will be used more than once.
Increase your connection
Great sex takes great connections, communication and making sex a priority. Toys can enhance intimacy, but you’ll have the most pleasure together if you have a solid foundation from the start. Don’t forget to romance your partner before heading to the bedroom.
Have a conversation first
Open sexual communication allows you increased pleasure and intimacy. If you’ve never had a conversation about toys before, drop it casually at first or mention it’s a fantasy and see how they react.
Buy a toy that you are both comfortable with
While it may spoil the surprise, shopping together is fun, intimate and a great motivator.
Should it be a surprise? Check out the best sex toys for beginners section of this article
If you’re still not sure if your partner will love the gift of a toy, buy them something else to go with it. That way they don’t feel like they missed out and it’s a win-win situation.
Here’s my guide to the best (expert-approved) sex toys for self-love and partner play.
Note: It is worth investing a little more to get a quality sex toy. They last longer and are made from body-safe materials for safer, longer-lasting pleasure.
Best sex toy for beginners
Clitoral Pebble Vibrator, Lovehoney, $79.95
A small, discreet clitoral vibrator perfect for anyone new to sex toys. It can be used alone or in partner play. Insert it in foreplay to add extra stimulation to a massage, or use it during intercourse to push you over the limit.
Lelo Ora 3, Lovehoney, $207.96 (MSRP $259.95)
This ring-shaped sex toy also vibrates and simulates oral sex for women. Use it in self love or partner play.
Best toy for couples
We-Vibe Chorus, Lovehoney, $299.99
The We-Vibe is the classic sex toy for couples – and with good reason. To get you both over the edge, you can’t get past this wearable device that stimulates her G-spot and clitoris while you have intercourse.
Best toy for women
The Satisfyer Pro 2, Lovehoney, $79.95
The sex toy everyone is talking about these days. This was designed to mimic the sensation of oral sex. Use alone, combine with love play, or use with another toy.
The Enigma, Lelo, MSRP $279 for sale $251.10
With dual clitoral and G-spot stimulation, this is a perfect toy for self-love or to please your special lady.
Best toy for men
Lelo F1S V2, Lovehoney, $219.96 (MSRP $274.95)
This vibrating sleeve offers the ultimate in manual pleasure and can be used solo or as part of a couples game when it’s time to focus on him.
Lelo Hugo Prostate Massager, Lovehoney, $231.96 (MSRP $289.95)
While it’s not for everyone, if your man is open to the pleasures of the prostate, this hands-free device can take pleasure to the next level.
Best lube and cleaning products for sex toys
You invest in a toy, so you want to take care of it and get the most out of it. Combine your gift with these helpful extras.
Flickering Touch Massage Candle, Lelo, $49.95
A candle that fades into a warm, luxurious massage oil, Flickering Touch is perfect for creating a romantic atmosphere and warming things up.
System JO Water-Based Lube, Lovehoney, $24.95
There’s no shame in using lube. A good water-based lube can help both of you get the ultimate pleasure from your toy. The JO H2O system is safe to use with toys and partner sex.
Lovehoney Fresh Toy Cleanser, 250ml
Keep your toys clean, safe and hygienic by spraying on Love Honey Toy Cleaner before and after each use.
Isiah McKimmie is a leading relationship and intimacy expert and author of the Relationship Rehab column on news.com.au. She holds a Masters in Relational Psychotherapy, a Masters in Science in Medicine (Sexual Counseling/Psychosexual Therapy), a Postgraduate Diploma in Sexology and a Certificate from the prestigious Institute for the Advanced Studies of Human Sexuality. .
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